Friday, October 23, 2009

Allergic to water?

I'm guessing probably not. So why am I getting hives every time I shower?

Well, of course at first I thought it was the soap. But I've tried a variety of soaps, all to the same effect. And the thing is, the red blotchyness is starting before any soap has even touched my body. So.

Water too hot? Doubtful. I am very, very sensitive to water. I can't take very hot showers; Jonathan thinks I'm crazy for how lukewarm I keep the water. So that one doesn't make much sense either.

My therapist keeps trying to figure out if there was some specific trauma related to showering, but we can't figure out anything. Just a general sense of vulnerability and weakness. But that's always been the case. So why would this start now, when I'm safer than I've ever been? This is the first apartment I've ever lived in where I didn't spend my entire shower "hearing" people breaking into the place.

So I don't know what's going on, but it's frustrating as hell. Tonight it's not just my arms and back as it has been for the past couple of weeks; I also have one in my ear and two on my face. Glorious. Yet another reason not to shower in the morning, I suppose...

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